What Nursing Taught Me About Disconnection—And Why I Had to Leave

Are You Going Through the Motions or Are You Truly Aware and Feeling?

The Moment I Knew I Had to Stop Ignoring My Soul

There was a time when I thought exhaustion was normal. That anxiety before a shift, the emotional numbness, the chaos, and the deep fatigue were just part of the job—part of life.

I spent years in nursing, showing up for 12-hour shifts, surrounded by sickness, addiction, suffering, loss, and traumatic life events. At some point, what once might have bothered me became just another routine moment. Death, trauma, human suffering—it all started to feel… normal.

But normal wasn’t the same as right.

What hit me the hardest wasn’t just the chaos—I could handle chaos. What got me was the disconnection.

I watched people who had no power over their bodies, their minds, their health.
I saw people living lives completely out of touch with themselves, waiting for someone or something to fix them.
And the truth is, I was becoming one of them and who was coming to save me from what I had created?

The Silent Cost of Going Through the Motions

At first, I told myself I was fine and I could handle it. That this was just what it meant to be “strong.”
But strength and numbness are not the same thing.

The signs were there:

• The dread that set in before every shift.
• The anxiety that mounted before walking through the doors into another 12-hour day of emotional, mental, and physical depletion.
• The disconnect I felt—not just from my job, but from myself in order to endure and help those in need.

I had become so accustomed to survival mode that I didn’t even realize I had stopped feeling. And once I saw it, I couldn’t unsee it.

When Awareness Hits, You Can’t Stay the Same

Awareness is a funny thing. Once you wake up to the truth—that you are merely existing instead of truly living—there’s no going back.

I had a choice:
I could either stay in the life that was draining my soul, or I could choose something different.

I could keep going through the motions, or I could start feeling again.

So, I chose to leave.

From Numb to Awake: Choosing to Live with Awareness

Walking away from a secure career into the unknown wasn’t easy. But what was harder was staying in a life that wasn’t mine anymore.

I actually took a while to rest and begin the process of restoring myself. Then instead of going back to college and starting a traditional career round two, I decided to take a new approach and stepped into soul mentorship, because I knew:

• People didn’t just need healing—they needed empowerment.
• We weren’t meant to be passive observers of our own lives.
• We are meant to be creators, deeply engaged in our own power, our own awareness, our own potential.

Leaving nursing wasn’t just about leaving a job. It was about choosing to live differently. To wake up. To feel. To guide others into their own power.  To assist them in restoring their energy, releasing pain, and essentially rewiring their lives.

Are You Living or Just Existing?

So, I ask you: Are you truly aware and feeling? Or are you just moving through the motions of your life?

If you feel stuck in routine, disconnected from yourself, exhausted by a life that no longer feels like your own—that is your soul speaking to you.

It’s not asking you to drop everything overnight. But it is asking you to wake up. To choose something different. To take one step, however small, toward living with awareness and feeling again.

Because life isn’t just meant to be survived. It’s meant to be felt.

Closing Thoughts: The Power of Choosing Awareness

For me, leaving nursing was about stepping into a new way of being. It was about reclaiming my power, my presence, and my ability to feel deeply again.  And ultimately to live the second half of my life in true alignment with my Soul.

For so long, I believed that exhaustion and emotional numbness were just part of life, part of being strong. But true strength isn’t about enduring what no longer serves us—it’s about having the courage to change.

I know I’m not alone in this. So many of us become desensitized to our own lives, caught in a cycle of obligation, routine, and silent burnout. We normalize disconnection because it’s what we’ve been taught—to push through, to keep going, to do what’s expected.

But here’s the truth: Life is not meant to be passively endured. It is meant to be deeply felt, fully lived, and intentionally created.

If you’ve been feeling the weight of disconnection—whether in your work, your relationships, or within yourself—consider this your sign to pause. To listen. And ask yourself some honest and deep questions.

Because you don’t have to wait for a breaking point to choose awareness. You don’t have to stay in places that drain you. You don’t have to keep living on autopilot.

You always have a choice. And that choice starts now.

Robin Dinaso / The Rhythmic Being